Time

I wonder when motivation kicks in. What does it take? My father died a week ago. He had been ill, but the timing seems off. We assumed he had time left. That got me to thinking about time. We always think that we'll have tomorrow to do what we just didn't get to today, but maybe we won't. I think about the life I'd like to have. It includes more friends, more freedom to do the thinks I keep myself from doing because of my weight. It also includes companionship and dare I say love. Being overweight is isolating. I do it to myself, and it is done to me by others. People don't seem to want to take the time to get to know who I am as a person. They don't like what they see on the outside, so I guess, they figure they won't like what's on the inside.

I'm not silly enough to believe that being thin solves all of a person's problems, but it doesn't hurt. Maybe there is a whole other list out there of problems just waiting for the day I finally lose the weight. Honestly, I'd welcome them. At least, they would be a change of pace.

So, back to time. It is so easy to say, "I'll start tomorrow. I'll worry about that on Monday. This isn't a good time, maybe next week." I just have to wonder, how much time is left?